My search for strength

I often dig deep into myself ,
with a question for company in search of it answer
for often i wonder what strength is all about

Is it to stand tall after a fall
or to hide ones tears for the sake of all

Is it the property of victorious
or may be what make life of a martyr glorious

Probably to stamp ones authority and demand for what one wants
or may be to accept ones undoing ignoring others taunts

is it to befriend the shield and the sword
or to forgive every sinner, win him over with the might of ones words

Is it lead a life of principles not compromised for convenience
probably swimming in the oceans when the storm is intense

or is it to break up and cry at ones defeat
or the feeling of loneliness engulfs you as your world crumbles under your feet

Is it beyond men to understand what it means
or is it subconscious which helps us redeem.

- firebird

Star

pushed into a corner , i found myself
no light , but only shadows to stare at

all my knowledge seemed to have surrendered
and the might of fear seemed to overwhelm my faith

for my defeat looked inevitable even to a fool
and my existence one with darkness

for a volcano of emotions burst out in my heart
a few of anger , lots of hatred for those who gave this dark gift

i burnt in my anger , and hatred; one with the gloom around me
i was transforming into the very same darkness i disowned

a rude awakening one may say when my broken knowledge woke me up
it was astonishing how far i had walked away from where i wanted to be

with a pat on my shoulder " let do it, not try " said my knowledge
from that day till time bid me bye , i stare the darkness in its face,
for that's why they call me a STAR

-- firebird

The Wait

In search of those expressions, that smile than looks
Not a person who listens to me , who gives me a ear
but some one who reads me like a book

A search that leads me to directions none worth pursuing
I see a hole in the ship of my optimism , thats begun sinking

For there are suggestion , of change
and to be happy in what I find rather than what i seek
But I also know it wouldn't be me then ,
and no meaning left in what i seek

tempted to change I am I must admit, but "what if ??" my optimism roars
" What if I find the reader
all the expressions, that smile , I have desired forever
"
Would she be cheated by my decision to change,
for in my optimism and desire was she born
Amongst all this storm, all I now desire is for dawn
-- firebird